A fast reply can be useful, especially when someone needs a decision. But speed alone does not tell you whether the message received real attention. A quick answer that misses the question can create another round of work.
Presence in communication can take several forms: answering the actual concern, remembering an agreed follow-up or giving a conversation enough attention to understand it. None requires every notification to interrupt everything else.
Start by separating urgent coordination from messages that can wait. When a relationship needs a particular response expectation, discuss it directly rather than assuming that instant availability is a shared rule.
You can acknowledge a message when helpful: ‘I’ve seen this and need time to read the detail.’ Add a follow-up commitment only if you can honour it.
A communication tool should be judged partly by whether it helps you direct attention to what matters. Producing more replies is not automatically the right outcome for every conversation.
Try looking at one day of messaging by purpose rather than count. Which exchanges needed your judgment? Which were already complete? Which deserved a slower, more considered response? The aim is to make room for appropriate attention, so being connected does not become an obligation to remain continually interruptible.